via octa.net
The OCTA is sponsoring a transit forum on Friday February 5 at Chapman University in Orange to discuss the current transit crisis. Click on the linkfor more information.
Friday, January 29, 2010
Liebestod
Liebestod
The lantern danced with the devil
Singing liebestod forever.
What a pair they were
Whriling and twirling in their ghastly delight
Lebiestod!
Liebestod!
Forever!
The devil was in the details of the dance
The lantern was is in the beauty
Round and round they went chanting their haunting song
While the lights cast an eery glow on the floor
Where their feet never seemed to touch
But in the end the dance must end
This ode to liebestod
Even the dance has to unite with the one it loves
And then they will spin the night away
In that waltz of life and death
Life and death are lovers
Who as they dance,
Can never touch the floor
And they cry liebestod forever!
Beauty and Madness
Beauty and Madness
see beauty
you are mad
see madness
you are beautiful
see nothing
you are dead
see the beautful lights
you are blinded
see hope
you are alive
alive you see beauty
but does that not mean that you are mad?
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
A Poem About Nothing
A Poem about Nothing
This poem has no point
It is not trying to tell a story
Or convey an emotion
It just IS
And that is all there is to it
No reason no story
No grand design the scheme of things
It just IS
And that is all there is to it
This poem is not trying to occupy space
Or take up anyones time
It has nothing to say
It just IS
And that is all there is to it
Dont expect it to reveal the meaning of life
To do that the poem would have to have meaning
It just IS
And that is all there is to it
This poem really is about nothing
Or rather the absence of nothing,
Which is really an abstract concept
That is impossible for our minds to fathom
How can this poem be about nothing?
It just IS
And that is all there is to it
A Shadow in the Darkness
A shadow in the darkness
I am a deception
Created by lies
And borne of the shadow
To know me is to see the phantasms in the mirror
Shadow fires burn in my heart
Words of love are meaningless
For lies are true
And words are not words
But are the shadow in the darkness
As much evil resides in me
There is love
Masking the shadow in the darkness that lies beneath
And soon it will strike
The anti-message will fail
Monday, January 18, 2010
The Value of Time and Money
People often criticize me for not donating money. I see money as an object that has no value and can be replaced. I donate time. Time is more valuable to me than anything else. it can't be bought or sold or traded. To me money is a material object and its rewards are only fleeting. When you spend time with someone the rewards last a lifetime. This may sound like a cliche but perhaps its something to ponder. Spending time doing something has the possibility to create lasting relationships and bonds that can't be broken. What can money get you but the temporary satisfaction of something accomplished or done for someone? That moment is short lived and soon forgotten. Time is the most valuable gift we as human beings have to give. Don't waste it. Once its gone you can never get it back.
And The Days Go On
And the days go on
The sun sets as
The past gives way to the night
And the period of searching and wondering begins
The objective hidden in the cloud of the heart
And the days go on
What the future brings no one knows
And the night fades away
As the past gives way to the present
Constantly searching for the answer
As the isolation of the past sets in
And the solitude gives way to quiet thought and reflection
And the wondering leads to thoughts and decisions
That both frighten and embolden
And the days go on
What the future brings no one knows
And the night fades away
As the past gives way to the present
Still the thoughts of regret nip at the heels
But with each step they fade like the past
And as the uncertainty looms
The wayward spirit knows
That the days go on
What the future brings no one knows
And the night fades away
As the past gives way to the present
The future may frighten
But it is being scared of change
Is better than than the cowardice of the past
And standing at the gates of uncertainty
The first step is taken
And the days go on
What the future brings no one knows
And the night fades away
As the past gives way to the present
Sunday, January 17, 2010
Esteem or why I have none.
I have learned to associate myself with better people than me so that I have a reason to believe in myself. I guess the reasoning behind that is that if I can be friends with someone who has potential for great things or done great things because then maybe I have the same potential or why would that bother spending time with me? I must be worth it, even though some people in my own family treat me like I'm some child...a classic example of this was this summer when I was doing my internship in New York. My mother came with me, not just for a few days but for the whole summer because as she so clearly stated I wouldn't be able to ever make it on my own. if it wasn't for the fact that my residence only let non-residents in with the permission of the tenants my mom would have been in my home all the time even when I wasn't there. I had paid a lot of money to live there, but I had to be in the untenuable position of telling administrators not to let her in when I wasn't there. To be frank I had to be like that because she's a very domineering person and I knew that it would be the only way that I could have some semblance of independence. all of this while I was trying to deal with my internship and then the death of my sister who had encouraged me to the internship because she's only one in my family who gave a damn about me.
no one should have to do that to their own parents. I felt like I was worthless because my mom has never believed in me. she used to tell me that I dressed like a homeless person all the time...and constantly says that I'm fat to my face. During the summer she gave my bed away and I have been sleeping on the couch like the some visitor in my own home.
Anyways to me this summer was my chance to prove once and for all to her that I could live on my own, but I found myself feeling like the bad guy particularly in one instance when she had called me several times when I was at my internship begging me to rescind me to the order barring her from entering my home when I wasn't there. I knew I was hurting her but she didn't realize what she was doing to me or how I was hurting having to do those things. I knew that if I let her in what would happen, nothing would change she would be there every day. One of the reasons I decided to do my internship in New York was so I could experience a modicum of independence. Even now I wonder where I got the strength to do what I did. Letting her in when I wasnt there, would not be beneficial to my own personal growth. So I stood up to her. I had to. And now I've learned that in order for me to be independent I would have to stand up to her ALL the time. But having to listen to this message of I think you can do it but not without me because it won't be done right has always filled with doubts and insecurities. Because the underlying message of her words is that nothing I ever do will be good enough or be done right and thus always flawed. And she wonders why I have weight problems? Perhaps it hasn't dawned on her that I eat so I can feel better about myself.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
The Ballad of Billy Joe
Billy Joe had always believed in love
Until her husband Brian beat her beliefs out of her
She would tremble with fear
Hoping that he would not come home drunk
Because if he did,
His fists would come raining down on her like a hail of bullets
Their son would see this
And beat on kids in school
Using the same words that Brian used
Like father like son
Billy Joe loved her son dearly
And hated Brian
His constant abuse had left her broken
But one day Billy Joe found the resolve to fight back
Her end to the abuse was simple
She did it without even realizing what she had done
The prosecutor called Brian's murder a crime of passion
Billy Joe always maintained that it was self-defense
Through the trial
And into the sentencing
When she stood before the judge,
He gave her life in prison without the possibility of parole
Simply because she wanted to have a life free from abuse
And a free life she had in her jail cell
Her friends abandoned her
And her son refused to see her
Billy Joe spent many years in prison
Until one of the guards found her
She was hanging from the ceiling by her belt
At her feet was a small note addressed to her son
It said simply: I love you
Her funeral was very small
It was only attended by her son and his wife and daughter
All her son could think about was the lesson he had learned
Love has nothing to do with control or fear or denigration
Love is commitment and respect and devotion
The City of Angels (A dream lost and reborn) A tribute to Los Angeles
the City of Angels (A dream lost and reborn)
There once was a dream that was Los Angeles
A dream that was once whispered in the halls of power
So as to not vanquish the idea as it wafted through the air
A whisper so soft it seemed as if but a dream
There once was a dream that born in the bosom in the Lady of the Angels
A dream that inspired hope into millions
but underneath that dream lay the nightmare
A nightmare of false illusion and fantasy that destroyed the city.
but even nightmares are dreams of what could be and not of what is.
there once was a dream of a city like no other
a city that inspired dreams and fantasies
a city with possibility and a future as bright as when the city was founded in the bosom of the Lady of the Angels
There once was a dream that was Los Angeles
A dream that was once whispered in the halls of power
So as to not vanquish the idea as it wafted through the air
A whisper so soft it seemed as if but a dream
There once was a dream that born in the bosom in the Lady of the Angels
A dream that inspired hope into millions
but underneath that dream lay the nightmare
A nightmare of false illusion and fantasy that destroyed the city.
but even nightmares are dreams of what could be and not of what is.
there once was a dream of a city like no other
a city that inspired dreams and fantasies
a city with possibility and a future as bright as when the city was founded in the bosom of the Lady of the Angels
Friday, January 8, 2010
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Think twice before saying "That willl happen when pigs can fly"...haha
via Pixelpipe